(to the tune of The Wicked Witch is Dead from the Wizard of Oz)

Ding! Dong! The mold is gone! From my house, the toxic mold!

Ding Dong! The toxic mold is gone!

Install the she-eet rock, hang dry wall, paint the room.

Breathe free! The toxic mold is gone!

Last week was a rough week for Bean. I’m not entirely sure what was going on, but she was awfully needy and she was doing that great toddler thing where nothing would make her happy - not even getting what she wanted (and then didn’t want). There were crying fits, and tantrums, and whining and more crying fits. By Saturday night I’d had enough of it. I tried a new tactic. She was lying on the floor in the middle of a crying fit. I laid down next to her. And asked what was going on. She insisted that she didn’t want to wear a diaper. Ever. Again. (mama smiles on the inside)

Being bedtime, I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea. But then, I have been trying to get her to this point for ages. So I jumped on it. She wore big kid underpants to bed Saturday night. And I put a waterproof pad on her bed. And it stayed dry all night! First thing in the morning she wet it, but that’s okay.

It’s now Monday morning, and she hasn’t worn a diaper or pull-up in about 38 hours. There have been plenty of accidents, but she’s telling us when she needs to go (sometimes), and she’s perfectly happy to try the potty at regular intervals even if she doesn’t feel like she needs to go. And when she has an accident, she isn’t traumatized! And she doesn’t insist on going back to diapers! This is one happy mama.

It’s funny. This is the same way she quit nursing. She’d been rejecting it periodically for a while - her way of struggling with the issue. Then one day every time I tried to latch her on she bit me. Every time. Multiple times. She refused to nurse. For 4 straight days. Then I took the hint. And that was it - she never wanted to nurse again. (sigh.) I have to say, giving up diapers cold turkey was a much happier occasion for me! I just hope Little Man gives up his binky that way! (I’m sure I won’t be that lucky though!)

To celebrate independence from diapers we went out for ice cream yesterday. That was for her. I think I’ll treat myself to a margarita when all this is done!

We missed you. Bean especially. Little Man didn’t really notice you were gone, except when it was time to put drops in his little ears and there was nothing to entertain him. But the good thing is, we learned a lot while you were off. Here’s our list:

• Little Man really loves to play Ring Around the Rosie.
• Bean uses each color of paint before using any color a second time.
• The radio is much more fun than the TV - everyone likes dancing to the music.
• The fish in the tank at Bass Pro Shop are even more fun than a trip to the acquarium.
• A fitted sheet makes a better tent than a wool blanket.
• Watering the flowers usually entails getting wet.
• Little Man truly believes that gravity is a myth.
• Ingesting sand won’t kill you. Even handfuls of it.
• Gwen Stefani and KT Tunstall have great beats for dancing to.

Having learned all that, o dear television, we’ve decided that you’re not nearly as important to us as we’d previously believed. From now on we’ll be spending less ‘quality’ time with you. I hope you understand. In the meantime, Little Man will continue to test gravity while Bean experiments with the unfailing wet-ness of water. Thank you for understanding, and I appreciate that we can trust you to be there for us, even if we don’t come around so often.

Bean turned 3 a few weeks ago. I struggled with what to do for her birthday, and all she wanted was a purple dinosaur cake. So we did the cake, hubby and I got her a new trike, and at the last minute we invited over 2 of her closest friends. That’s right, just 2. And we asked them not to bring gifts. (Oh! the scandal!)

One of the guests did as I asked. No gifts. But her kids (all 4 of them) colored pictures for Bean - and that meant the world to her. The other mom felt the need to buy a gift, and I can understand that. But Bean loved her birthday - she got some books and a few toys from family members, she had her purple dinosaur cake, and most importantly, she had a blast playing with her closest friends. And for some reason, when I talk to other moms, I always feel the need to justify the fact that we did a small party. And I don’t even tell people that we asked for no gifts… what would they think?!

Today we went to the 3rd birthday party of one of Bean’s classmates. For her 3rd birthday there were about 15 kids, and double that number of adults. There were so many kids that we never really saw the birthday girl. They rented a bounce house, had a kitchen full of pizza delivered, and then brought the kids inside to open presents. And let me tell you, there were more presents than I could have imagined. A whole room full of presents. And that 3 year old went through them like wild fire. Opened one, looked at it, said “oooh, wow!” and then was ready to move on. There was one moment as she was opening her gifts when I thought that my kids were missing out. I mean, this little girl was getting oodles of dresses and princess costumes and pajamas and games and toys - there was nothing she didn’t have. And my kids’ lives will never be like that. So for a brief moment I thought that I should be proving more for my kids.

And then I realized that as I watched the birthday girl, she had no interest in most of it. She wasn’t very thankful. Sure, her mom was modeling the perfect amount of excitement over every gift. Mom was telling her to say thank you to the proper people at the proper time. But the birthday girl couldn’t care less. In fact, she kept trying to escape from the onslaught of toys and gifts to go back outside and play.

Gifts and toys aren’t what my kids need. I’m glad those parents gave their little girl a memorable third birthday - and got it all on film. I’m glad they did the bounce house - all the kids loved it. But I’m quite happy with Bean’s 2-invitee party. And I’m still happy that I asked people not to bring gifts. She doesn’t need them. She didn’t miss them. And sitting at this party today, she didn’t even notice that there was a whole room full of gifts. There was no jealous green monster wondering why some kids have more ’stuff’ than others. That’s not what she needs. She needs time. That’s her love language. Quality time. Attention. To be listened to and have her opinions and thoughts validated. She needs a safe place to explore who she is and what’s important to her. And to know that she’s loved, even when her behavior isn’t at its most lovable.

I don’t know what we’ll do next year. I don’t know if her parties will continue to be this small. I don’t know if I’ll ask people again not to bring gifts. I think that might get harder as she gets older. There will things that she wants. She’s an awfully observant kid. But one of the values I want my kids to have is longing. Not wanting everythin, or being jealous about what others have. But knowing what you truly want, and being willing to hold out for it. I don’t want them to have instant gratification - to get everything they want. It’s more important for them to always be reaching for something. Is that so terrible? I think it will serve them better in the long term than tens of their friends bringing truckloads of toys. There’s something special about a celebration, and gift-giving is an important thing in any child’s life, as is learning to receive gifts with thankfulness. But there’s something about a hopeful expectation, and being able to discern between things of value and just plain ’stuff.’ That’s what I want my kids to know.

Was anyone else shocked by the intense images on American Idol this week? It was really powerful. My hope is that the people who were touched by the show will make some long-term decisions about involvement of some sort, and search for long-term impact.

I have to say I’m impressed with how much time and money Idol put into this effort. It was pretty impressive. I’m so happy to see a major network doing something ambitious to effect change.

Supporting the cause in her own way, fellow blogger Owlhaven is giving away a copy of Bono’s book, On the Move, so head on over and enter yourself. I’d love to read it! I’ll probably pick one up at the library.

So, we’ve all got the outlet plugs, gates at the top of the stairs, and cabinet locks. And some of us have those ‘deluxe’ items like doorknob guards, stove and tv guards, and toilet seat locks. My kids are pretty safe at home with all that. There isn’t too much damage they can do in the short periods of time that I leave them in the room unattended. But now. A toddler in England got his head stuck in a toilet seat. So, moms and dads, the moral of the story is don’t let your toddler stick his head in a toilet seat. Perhaps a better rule is to not allow your toddler to be left alone in the bathroom.

I have to say though, that’ll be a great story to tell his date on prom night! I just hope mom got pictures!

Recently Little Man (16 months now!) has been experiencing skin rashes. We’re trying to figure out what’s causing it - an allergy to the detergent, something he ate, who knows… But, the treatment of it has been key to dealing with the problem. We’ve been using bath products recommended by a dermatologist and lotions recommended by the same dermatologist. And that does a great job. But the dermatologist also recommended that we buy Aveeno’s bath powder. I checked that out, and the main ingredient is oatmeal. And $9. (gasp!)

So I did some research, and it turns out you can make your own colloidal bath powder from whatever oatmeal you have at home. Quick-cooking, instant, slow cooking, as long as it’s unflavored it all works pretty much the same.

Blend it in your food processor or coffee grinder until you have a fine, consistent powder. To ensure that it has the colloidal property, dissolve 1 TSP in a glass of warm water. The oatmeal should blend easily with the water and be absorbed into it. It should give the water a milky look and silky feel. If not, blend a bit more and try again. You can use it immediately, or store it in an airtight container for later.

At bath time, sprinkle a handful (or about 1/3 cup if you’re a measurer) into the bath and swirl the water around a bit to mix it in and dissolve everything.

This works great to treat rashes, sunburn, chicken pox, or just to soften your skin for a nice relaxing bath. That’s what works for me. Check out Rocks in My Dryer for more Works For Me ideas.

My homeowners association is in the news. We have a sex offender living in the neighborhood and serving on the HOA board. Across the street from him is a sweet pastor’s wife who runs a home-based day care for a handful of kids, most of whom live in the neighborhood. And in the state of Georgia, that can’t happen. The board has used HOA dues to pay for a lawyer to close down the nice lady’s business, regardless of the fact that 67% of the homeowners signed a petition to keep the day care open. So now we’re trying to remove a few members from the board. We had an initial meeting at the local library tonight, and we had people from the Atlanta-Journal Constitution as well as Fox News. My moment of glory? The back of my head was on the nightly news tonight - and at least I was wearing my good earrings!

One of the tough questions brought up was if it’s fair to require one homeowner to move (which is what legally has to happen for the day care to stay open).  The board member has been a homeowner here for 10 years, and the daycare has been open for 6.  But the issue at this point is well beyond fairness. This man has resorted to some despicable tactics to attack the day care, including but not limited to deception, abuse of power, and creepy sneakiness. So if one person has to suffer consequences, it should be the man who made illegal choices, not the woman who owns a day care and not the parents who send their children to that day care.

So, Mrs. Kim, my prayers are with you, and may the key people in this situation have the wisdom to handle it appropriately.

Sounds too good to be true, but I’m trying it anyway. Today is the start of TV turnoff week. We found out when we went to Little Man’s doctor appointment today for his second ear infection since he got tubes in less than a month ago. As an aside, the doctors have no idea why he’s still getting frequent ear infections after having tubes placed. Isn’t that what we always want to hear from a doctor? “Gee, ma’am, I really don’t know. It doesn’t make a lot of sense.”

But I digress. So, it’s TV turnoff week. We just got back from the doctor about an hour ago, and I haven’t been very good about turning off the TV. I like the idea. Really, I do. I’ve noticed that Bean is a much happier child when she doesn’t sit in front of the babysitter TV. So I’ve been looking for strategies (and motivation) to bite the bullet, deal with the whining, and limit the kids’ TV watching a bit more. In fact, just last week after Bean asked me for the 40th time in 2 minutes if she could watch Curious George (and was told “no” 39 times), I replied with the rather harsh answer of “if. you. ask. me. one more time! I. will. throw the TV. in. the. trash. And you’ll never watch TV again!” That was followed by Bean’s incredulous and somewhat confused, “what?” with her head cocked to the side. She was convinced mama had lost it.

So, the TV-Turnoff Network has a little website with tips for parents (and teachers) to help us find alternative activities to being in front of a screen - the TV specifically, but they suggest also limiting computer time (ouch!). There are some surprising statistics, such as each hour a day your child spends in front of the TV increases the chances that they’ll be a bully by 9%. It also says that most American kids spend 5 hours a day watching TV. That means those kids’ risk of bullying is up 45% compared to children who don’t watch TV (are there any of those out there?). There is a little voice inside me that says Bean is a little too passive and maybe she can pick up some of those more ‘assertive’ tendencies that other kids are getting if I just plop her in front of the TV a bit more… But that’s probably not the idea behind this.

We usually do pretty well with limiting TV viewing. The problem starts when one child is sick and wants to veg on the couch, be around people, but do nothing. So we let them sit in front of the TV. For more hours than I care to admit. And when they’re healthy again, they’ve discovered new shows, gotten used to having the TV on all the time, and seem to have a rather important ‘relationship’ with certain shows. It seems like they miss them, just as much as they miss Grama and Papa. Breaking free of that is hard.

Anyhow, I’m going to give it a shot. I let the kids watch TV in the car (I love my car DVD player) on the way home from the doctor - just minutes after being told about the TV turnoff initiative. What does that tell you? But I’m going to try harder. No TV for a week. For the kids, right? I can still watch Grey’s Anatomy after they go to bed, right? And Bones. And American Idol and 24. Hmm.. Maybe I should re-think that.

But back to the kids. Here are my ideas for creative activities this week:

• Today (after naps): Gardening in the back yard - our vegetable seeds have sprouted and are ready to be moved outside.
• Tuesday: Draw pictures and thank you cards for birthday gifts. Maybe we’ll do hand prints on card stock for the thank you cards.
• Wednesday: Make a giant fort with sheets and furniture.
• Thursday: Play ball at the park with playgroup.
• Friday: Trip to a museum - either the natural history museum or a children’s museum.
• Saturday: Picnic at the park.
• Sunday: Scavenger hunt in the yard.

Well, those activities might not keep the kids busy all day long, but it’s a start. And my sincere hope is that once we’ve broken free pf the TV monster, Bean won’t be so insistent on watching it after this week. We’ll see about that.

How about you? Wanna participate in TV Turnoff week? Leave me a comment. And whether you’re participating this week or not, let me know how you limit TV.

We’ve been in this battle with toxic mold for 10 weeks now. We’ve dished out around $1,000 for a handful of inspections, and a much greater sum to a remediation company. Of course, there was the first remediation company who charged us a ridiculous amount to do nothing, but in the end we won that battle. We got to keep the mold and our money too. So now we’re on round 4 of this. I have the negative air machine running in my mold room living room and I truly hate it. It sounds like a jet engine. It’s awful. We’ll have another inspection in a few days. And after that, we’ll know by next week if we still have toxic mold. And if - miracle of miracles - the mold is gone, then we can replace the wall and the flooring and the furniture. And have our garage and living room and playroom and Bean’s bedroom back. Man! When we got into this, we had no idea it would take us this long to fix.